In what’s probably the dumbest move since Paul Schrader cast Lindsay Lohan in what will probably be the last movie he makes before he’s run out of Hollywood on a rail, The IOC has decided to remove wrestling from the Olympics so they can add that bastion of athleticism… Golf. Yes. The game played by old men with plastic hips has replaced wresting as an Olympic sport.
And apparently some turd-brained Russian wrestling coach has blamed the gays and the “gay conspiracy” against masculinity. Cuz ya know… those gays hate masculinity.
“If they expel wrestling now, that means that gays will soon run the whole world,” Uruimagov said, adding that cutting wrestling from the Olympic program was “a blow to masculine origins.”
As the guy who came up with the idea for Fratmen On The Mat AND the guy who directed Cocksure Men’s movie “Wrestle To Fuck,” I call Bullshit.
On behalf of those of us who really enjoy blowing masculine origins, I want to just draw your attention to the following TOTALLY UNSCIENTIFIC study I just did while sitting here in my office waiting for video to render.
Number of Wrestling porn I own:: 259.
Number of Weight Lifting Porns I own: 136.
Number of Water Ballet Porns I own: 0.
Number of Figure Skating Porns I own: 0.
Number of Dressage Porn Porns I own: 0.
Number of Steeple Chase Porns I own: 0.
Number of Martial Arts Porns I own: 78.
Number of Golf Porns I own: 1. (technically 1/3. There’s a golf scene in Titanmen’s Blind Spot.)
Number of Curling Porns I own: 0.
Number of Table Tennis porns I own: 0.
Number of Badminton Porns I own: 0.
Number of Luge Porns I own: 0.
Number of Equestrian Porns I own: 0.
Number of Fencing Porns I own: 1.
Number of Bobsled Porns I own: 0.
Number of Skeet Shooting Porns I own: 0.
Number of Hockey Porns I own: 4.
Number of Rugby Porns I own: 27.
I rest my case.
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For further reading, I draw your attention to my favorite post from our Olympic Wank Fest last year…
I also draw your attention to this picture from my last vacation to Island House in Key West where I think it’s VERY clear that gay men have absolutely no problem with wrestling, aquatic sports, masculinity or any other kind of physical activity.
To sum up… gay men like to wrestle.
Gay men like sports.
Gay men are not to blame for the morons on the IOC, none of whom are gay.
Oh and go to Island House in Key West and tell them I sent you.